On the road to recovery in Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), Step 3 marks a significant turning point. It’s where the rubber meets the road, so to speak. Here at Willowcherry.us, we delve into the essence of Step 3: “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.”
This step can be a source of both trepidation and liberation. It compels us to relinquish control and embrace a power greater than ourselves. But within this surrender lies the potential for profound transformation.
A Story of Surrender: From Fear to Freedom
Imagine David, a talented musician whose alcoholism has threatened to silence his music forever. Despite attending meetings and working Step 2, David continues to struggle with intrusive thoughts and cravings. He feels powerless against the relentless grip of addiction.
One night, at a particularly low point, David confides in his sponsor, a seasoned AA member named Michael. Michael listens patiently and then shares his experience with Step 3.
Michael explains that Step 3 isn’t about blind obedience or religious dogma. It’s about making a conscious decision to surrender the reins – to let go of the illusion of control and trust in a higher power, however we understand it.
David hesitates. Letting go feels risky, even terrifying. But with Michael’s guidance, he begins to see surrender not as weakness, but as a form of strength. It’s about acknowledging his limitations and embracing the possibility of a life beyond addiction.
As David takes Step 3, a sense of peace washes over him. He starts to experience a newfound willingness to trust the process, to believe that something greater is at work in his life. This newfound surrender empowers him to focus on his recovery journey, one day at a time.
The Power of Surrender in a Self-Reliant World
In today’s society, we often equate success with self-reliance and control. We’re bombarded with messages telling us to “hustle harder” and “be our own boss.” But Step 3 of AA offers a powerful counterpoint.
Surrender, as envisioned in Step 3, isn’t about giving up. It’s about acknowledging the limitations of the ego and embracing the possibility of something greater guiding us. It’s about letting go of the need to control every aspect of our lives and opening ourselves to the possibility of transformation.
This concept resonates with many of today’s most pressing issues:
- Mental health: The act of surrender in Step 3 aligns with the growing emphasis on self-compassion and vulnerability in mental health treatment. By letting go of self-blame and shame, we create space for healing.
- Burnout: In our fast-paced world, Step 3 serves as a reminder of the importance of rest and letting go. By surrendering to a higher power, we can release the burden of control and find peace.
- Social justice: The concept of surrender in Step 3 can inspire us to connect with something larger than ourselves and work towards a more just and equitable world.
The Big Book and the Philosophical Exploration of Step 3
The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous offers a nuanced perspective on Step 3. It emphasizes that the “higher power” can manifest differently for each individual. It could be a connection to a spiritual tradition, a sense of awe inspired by nature, or the supportive community of AA itself.
The key is to find something that transcends the self and offers a sense of hope, guidance, and strength on the path to recovery.
Taking the Next Step: A Journey of Hope
Step 3 of AA is a powerful invitation to surrender and trust. It’s not about weakness; it’s about embracing the possibility of a life beyond addiction. By letting go of control and connecting with a higher power, we open ourselves to the transformative power of recovery.
At Willowcherry.us, we invite you to explore the wisdom of AA and embark on your own journey of healing. Remember, you are not alone. There is hope, and there is help available…
1. How do you feel about giving up control to a Higher Power? Does it feel scary or comforting? Are you willing to surrender control to something greater than yourself?: I feel good and content about the concept of giving control to a higher power. It is a comforting and mentally easing feeling, knowing I’m doing the will of something that knows best. I am absolutely willing to surrender control to something greater than myself; however, it can be hard at times. But this surrendering of control to a higher power is one of the founding spiritual principles of AA, and is something I have to do and be comfortable with.
2. Can you identify the root cause of your addiction? Was it because you made poor choices based on irrational thoughts or emotions? Did you experience a lack of self-control or discipline: I’m not exactly sure what the main root cause of my addiction is but I see it being a multitude of things: low self-esteem, the state of the world, Anhedonia, and the 9-5 work schedule. I think Anhedonia/depression is the main root cause. My meth addiction did progress because of irrational thoughts such as thinking I could stop at anytime. I absolutely began to experience a lack of self control when it came to meth I would constantly use massive amounts and stay up for days to over a week, constantly ending up in a paranoid schizophrenic (psychosis) state of mind. With alcohol and marijuana I had no control either and would be high/drunk all day everyday and going to work like that aswell. Kratom is the only one I had somewhat control on but still inevitably was at a lot higher doses then when I started on after my tolerance progressively increased.
3. Do you believe in fate or destiny, or do you think you have complete control over your life? How does your higher power fit into this belief system?: I believe in fate and destiny when it pertains to the will and guidance of a higher power, and only that of a higher power. I think one can have complete control over their life, but I don’t think it could be meaningful, joyful, and fulfilling as the life of someone who lets their higher power have control over their life. I think my higher power works through people and influences their thoughts and decisions, certain cellular functions, body and mental healing processes. I do not think my higher power can at all defy the laws of physics. I think if one can tap into the will of their higher power then they can possibly achieve fate and destiny.
4. What’s steps do you take to keep your Higher Power at the forefront of your mind each day? Do you find it challenging to make the necessary effort to maintain your sobriety and work towards recovery? What obstacles prevent you from putting in the necessary effort?: I try to always pray sincerely to begin and end the day; however, I often times fall short, but it’s a work in progress. I often times forget to pray or I get distracted in prayer or I do not feel like I prayed in-depthly enough or show enough gratitude for the life I have been given. Yes, I do find it challenging, not only for sobriety, but for anything pertaining to being a responsible and productive adult in life. I often used Kratom as a motivator. The obstacles that prevent me from putting in the necessary effort is my Anhedonia, my laziness, procrastination, ADD/ horrible focus, and distractions.
5. Do you use prayer as a way to connect with your higher power? What emotions do you feel when you pray? Do you believe intentions behind your prayer matter?: Lately, I have used prayer a lot more as a way to connect with my higher power. I feel emotions of inner-peace, comfort, happiness, focus, and love. I do indeed believe intentions behind your prayer matters, with the more sincere and noble the prayer, the more benefit you will have.
6. Have you had positive experiences with truth in the past? Have you ever felt let down or betrayed by someone you trusted? Do these experiences make it difficult to for you to trust others now?: No I have had bad experiences with trusting people in the past. Yes I’ve had close friends that have betrayed me and broke that sense of trust. These experiences absolutely make it difficult to trust others, I refuse to put myself in vulnerable situations (called trusting someone) other than close friends and family. My mother is the #1 person I can trust. I feel that trusting someone is being in a vulnerable state.
7. What gives your life purpose and meaning? Have you ever accomplished something that made you feel proud and fulfilled? Do you have goals or aspirations that give you a sense of purpose?: To be completely honest I don’t really have anything in my life that gives me purpose and meaning, other then a relationship with a higher power, but even that falls short. I feel that this is partly why I struggle with addiction. I felt proud and fulfilled when I did very well in school and got a 31 on the math SAT. I don’t really have any goals or aspire that give me a sense of purpose, but I think the thought of pursuing a higher education in chemistry may give me a sense of purpose.
8. Are there certain behaviors or habits that you find easier to let go of than others? Why is this? Are there things you hold onto despite knowing they are harmful or counter productive to your recovery: I find the habit of drinking sodas and junk food is easier to let go off then smoking, porn, and caffeine. I think this is because sugar isn’t as an addictive thing as the others listed. Yes, all 3 of the them I believe are harmful to my recovery, especially the pornography.
9. Are there specific behaviors or character defects/traits that continue to cause problems in your life? Are there things that you struggle to let go of despite knowing they are detrimental to your well-being? What steps can you take to work on surrendering to these issues?: Specific behaviors would be: procrastination, negative pessimistic thinking, laziness, anti-social, and isolating. Yes, that would be: masturbation/pornography, short format media, and laying in bed all day. Some steps I could take are exercising more, praying, rationalizing why these behaviors are detrimental to my well being, talking with my sponsor about these issues, fighting procrastination with discipline.